Who is man that you are mindful

David didn't know how long he'd sat on the bench, but darkness had fallen around him almost unnoticed. The park was still and quiet and the lack of lights made the night all the more clear. He continued to sit on the bench, not moving even a muscle, totally relaxed.
   As the darkness deepened stars began to appear in numbers David had never seen before, and the longer he sat there the more amazed he became. To get a better view and stop the crick in his neck David lay down on the bench, which was uncomfortable but he didn't care. Soon there were so many points of light he was finding it hard to pick out the well know constellations.
   Lying there David began to contemplate the vastness of the universe, and how much there was in it. Tiny, glowing, pink pricks that millions of light years away were giant, raging, balls of fire, and suddenly David felt very small.
   A shooting star flared for a moment and was gone.
   'My life,' David said aloud, 'is just a shooting star; burning for a moment and going out.' And yet here I am, he thought, and despite the massive-ness of the universe, or this world even, someone has given little me a chance to live. This made David feel even smaller, so he stopped thinking again and gazed up at the sky and then he spotted the Milky Way, and once he'd seen it he couldn't look at anything else.
   Men can argue and fight and die, but the stars remain forever, David thought, and I can lie on this bench tonight and tomorrow I can return to work, but somehow none of that will ever be enough. There must something more.

A day for pancakes

Sift the flour and crack the egg, mix in the milk and butter the pan. Get out the lemon and the sauces and, if you're like me, regret that you don't have any maple syrup.
Do you have friends round, or are you sharing a stack with a loved one?
Are you branching out into savoury pancakes?
And most importantly, can you flip your pancake without it folding over or indeed toss it right up in the air? (I'm still working on this bit)

Maybe you're not interested. Maybe it's all media hype. Or maybe it's the last day before lent, marking the start of the lead up to Easter. A day to use up things you're not going to eat for a few weeks, resisting their tempting flavours.

Whether you like them or not, today is a day for pancakes.

The Rugby Match

Story inspired by this picture taken by Ray McManus that won the second prize Sports Singles as part of the World Press Photo awards.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/in-pictures-16979784





It was only five o’clock but heavy cloud made the light terrible. The world had turned colourless and damp like a murky watercolour painting. Everything was a mix of grey and brown as the muddy field merged with the darkening sky.

Light rain had fallen all afternoon, but it wasn’t until the game started that it really began to pour. A sparse crowd of parents and friends huddled on the sidelines, peering out from under umbrellas and raincoats, hoods pulled low. The grass quickly disappeared and it became harder to pick out the pitch markings, while the two teams became indiscernible as mud coated every player from head to foot.

          The ball was even harder to handle than usual and both teams made mistakes regularly. The tackles still came in but running was treacherous and kicking suicidal. The players, though, barely noticed. For them it was just a part of the game.

Afterwards the janitor moaned loudly at the state of the corridors and changing rooms. He didn’t like rugby. When he’d been younger the tougher kids had always frightened him. Now wet winter nights and the prospect of a long evening cleaning made him miserable.

          This night was one too many. He quit.
            The next morning girls squealed as they tried to avoid the mess in the P.E. corridor, but he wasn’t there to hear. When the telephone rang he told the headmaster where to find the broom cupboard.

The next time the school had a match, the boys were told to change outside. This time they moaned, but they won: 34-8. Now they do it every time.

The Silent Pianist

The pianist in the corner plays on. I have been his only companion for two hours now, but still his fingers keep up their constant movement, beating out one beautiful piece after another. Does he know I am still here? Does he realise everyone else has left?
            At first they applauded, but slowly they tired and then they departed. For me though there is something irresistible about his music, I must stay to listen. He is playing out his life, his heart, his soul; but all I know is that he is a pianist, and I love him.
            I have come every day for a week, and stayed every night until the early hours of the morning. Always though he outlasts me. My eyes droop and when I wake he is gone. I cannot bring myself to stop his playing, and if I did, I do not think I would have the words to say to him. He too, would remain silent, the piano is his voice, but that is not to say he does not have any words to say. I know this because last night he left me a note.

You are very beautiful.

Tonight I have a note ready for him. I couldn’t think of a reply that summed up my feelings for him and his music. So instead I have simply put, ‘Thank you.’ It’s a beginning.

Go and buy oil

I love weddings. They are for me life's best moments. Everyone is happy, not just the husband and wife but all the guests too. Everyone is excited and ready for a celebration. If you're lucky you'll have been invited to the meal afterwards, and if that goes anything like the weddings I've been to, a party will  break out, usually around the time of the last course.
   But what would happen if you get invited to the wedding and you didn't make it. You know the bridegroom will be arriving soon, but you get distracted by other things and you don't get ready, and before you know it he's arrived and the wedding has started and the doors have been shut.
   This is a story Jesus told, in which ten virgins, five of them wise and five foolish, were waiting for the bridegroom and the wedding. The five wise virgins had prepared and brought extra oil for their lamps but the foolish had not. So when, at midnight, the bridegroom returns for the wedding the five foolish virgins have no oil for their lamps and the five wise virgins do not have enough to share. Then the five wise virgins go into the wedding and the celebration while the foolish ones go off to buy oil, but when they return the door has been shut and they cannot get in.
   This is a description of what Heaven will be like - the biggest and happiest party ever! The bridegroom has come briefly and soon he will return for the wedding. Are you ready? Is everything prepared? Do you know God?
   The bridegroom is Jesus and at the end of the parable he says to the five foolish virgins at the door "I do not know you." They asked for oil from the other five but there was not enough to go around. When Jesus comes one person's faith will not cover two people.
   There is no use in being good on the outside if you have nothing to sustain you on the inside. It is right to be good but it is not enough. You need the oil to keep you light burning when the bridegroom comes again. He is coming soon. Go and buy oil.

Long Walk Home

On Tuesday of this week I got my first new phone in five years! Now I like change but as the saying goes 'if it ain't broke don't fix it' and I'm not one to change just for the sake of it, so this was quite a big thing for me. The problem with having or doing something for a long time is that it can become comfortable, and that's another reason I don't change much, it's too easy to leave things as they are. So here is my first example of going from the safety of the Inside to the unknown Outside. Okay this may be a weak example, and I'm sure for most people the idea of getting a new phone is not that big a deal, but it will do.
     So, Tuesday evening, while on the bus home, I'm busy playing around on the new phone and I forget to replace my wallet back into my coat pocket. Of course I didn't realise at the time and so at my stop I'm simply got off and walked home. Not until the next morning as I was about to go out the door did I discover I'd lost it.
     I live in Bath at the moment; a lovely city, relatively small and pleasant. However, besides its many attractions it is also well known for its hills, and I currently live at the very top of one of them. So my first thought after realising my wallet was not in my pocket, and therefore neither was my bus pass, was 'I have got a long walk to the bus station (at the bottom of the hill), some two miles away, to see if it's been handed in'. The second thought I had was, 'I need to cancel my bank card', which I did.
     At the bus station I was relieved to find that my wallet had been handed in, although sadly without my bus pass, about £20 and, for some reason, two glasses wipes. The latter two I didn't mind so much but the bus pass bothered me, partly because it was worth over £70 and partly because as a student pass it will have been worthless to whoever took it (unless they've also aquired a student card).
     Anyway, the upshot of that was I had no bus pass and no money to buy a new one, so I have walked the hill from and to home at least once a day since wednesday and will continue to do so for a few more days yet. Fortunately I enjoy walking and it has lead me to think rather a lot about my final point - the planned new railway, HS2.
     This was a hot topic last week when approval was granted despite protests about the cost and damaging effect on the countryside. For me one of the biggest issues was that the first section wasn't going to be ready until 2026, which seems ridiculous. However besides all that I'm still at a loss as to why it's so important. We have trains that run from Birmingham to London and in a relatively quick time. Why is it that people need to get there in fifty minutes? And if there is a big need why is the railway not being built quicker? Whatever the answers I'm still not sure it's necessary. We live such frantic lives already and miss so much that goes on that I think we should just appreciate what we've got and live with it. And that's a case for leaving the craziness of Outside and stepping In.

Bath at twilight - 20/1/2012